When Jaguar South Africa calls you up and asks if you’d be interested in driving a new Jaguar F-Pace SVR for a weekend, you say yes, you say thank you, and you start speaking softly to your bank card.
This 5.0-litre, supercharged beast took a mere four days to eviscerate two 82-litre tanks of petrol, with each cent poured into it being money well spent.
It’s a beautiful monster that makes you want to drive as far and long as you can – and as you continue to learn the finer points of how it behaves, the more you are rewarded.
The last of its kind
The Jaguar F-Pace SVR is, quite possibly, the last of its kind.
Jaguar is moving towards being an all-electric brand as early as 2025, and the famous automaker could not have signed off the last chapter of its petrol-powered history in a more terrific manner.
The F-Pace SVR looks breathtaking, the sounds it emits are hypnotizing, and the strength it holds in that V8 powerplant is paralyzing.
The SVR charmed each and every person that saw it, sat in it, or felt its mountain-shifting power.
It’s not just that the SUV is fast and loud, and therefore “fun”.
When you’re in the SVR and it lunges out of the blocks, you can’t talk, you forget to breathe, and you struggle to move.
It’s a complete sensory overload for four seconds before the speedometer reads 100km/h, and as you come back from the transient state you can’t help but crack a smile, let out a laugh, and in the back of your mind feel relieved that you’re still on earth.
Then you do it all again, and again, and again.
It’s so well behaved the Jaguar, too, communicating its intentions perfectly through the taut suspension and supple steering wheel.
If this F-Pace doesn’t like what you are doing, it tells you before it’s too late. You’re never scrambling for grip, wondering if you’ll make the corner, or worrying about losing control and being sent off the side of the road.
It’s also usable as a daily driver if throttle inputs stay below 20%, anything more and you’re probably looking at a 12-month visit to your nearest correctional facility.
The proficiency of the SVR makes its driver more competent, but it won’t dish out its secrets to the wholly inexperienced, either.
If you don’t treat it right, the acceleration can feel weighed down and only really become enjoyable once you’re far past 100km/h. Do what it likes, though, and you’ll have a playful super SUV that hands out whiplashes for free no matter where the speedometer stands.
Never before have I used shifters paddles this frequently, just to hear the exhausts pop and spatter everywhere I went.
I kept a window open at all times to enjoy the sounds more, and I even forgot to connect my phone to the infotainment system for the first two days, due to the unadulterated pleasure of being in control of the SVR.
Going hand-in-hand with the daunting personality of this Jaguar is attention of all kinds.
The standard F-Pace already looks quite sporty. Enough to allow the range-topper to somewhat fly under the radar if you’re not craving envious stares.
However, there’s no hiding the glorious tailpipe burble and once that starts turning heads, the ferocious design of the SVR keeps the eyes of onlookers locked until it’s out of sight.
I got nods of approval, thumbs up, enthusiasts at red lights asking me to “gun it”, and motorists giving me undeserved space just so they can drive behind the quad-exhausted Jaguar.
At the other end of the spectrum, there were also people I haven’t spoken to in years who came out of the woodwork to ask if they can have a ride in it.
Assuming it’s because I’m younger than the average person who drives these types of cars, there were also quite a few judgeful facial expressions pointed in my direction.
Nevertheless, every second that passed in the F-Pace wasn’t one I wanted to repeat, it was one I had to.
It’s a once-in-a-generation vehicle that doesn’t feel like it was built to fill an empty spot in a line-up, but rather to be the best super SUV it could possibly be.
Not one person, no matter how much they dislike going fast, had a negative attitude after they got out.
People who have before said that they are “not that big on cars” changed their mind with the F-Pace, saying “this one is different.”
The SVR satisfies a primitive desire in its admirers that is impossible to hide – whether they experienced its brutal power or only reveled in its presence – which is a sign of a car that’s on its way to becoming an icon.
The F-Pace SVR is absolutely magnificent in its execution, and it’s a fitting vehicle to close the doors on the Jaguar we once knew.
Jaguar F-Pace SVR
Keyword: What it’s like driving a V8 Jaguar for a weekend