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In perhaps the ultimate commentary on the drug-fueled, hedonistic ‘80s, Robin Williams once famously proclaimed that “Cocaine is God’s way of telling you you’re making too much money.” Of course, he knew all about the perils of the Peruvian Marching Powder, a goodly portion of his Mork and Mindy millions finding their way up his nose.
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Thankfully for all of us, his problem with benzoylmethylecgonine was but a temporary setback for the comedic genius, the only real lasting effect from his time freebasing being six minutes and fifty-nine seconds of the greatest standup the world has ever witnessed.
His real genius, however, may have been in asking what one does after one kicks the silver spoon. Williams’ personal solution was miring himself in exercise. That solves the endorphin problem, but no matter how Jane Fonda your personal trainer is, all that sweating will not generate the requisite dopamine rush or allow you to lord your untold riches over the less-deserving.
The question then becomes how does a now health-conscious dot-com billionaire spend all those ill-gotten millions without sacrificing the euphoric high and dopamine-fueled feeling of invincibility?
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May I suggest a Lamborghini Essenza SCV12?
Perhaps that begets other questions: What’s an SCV12, you ask, and what makes it the perfect vehicle for the modern, now-drug-free hedonist?
The 2022 Lamborghini Essenza SCV12 Photo by Lamborghini
The 2022 Lamborghini Essenza SCV12 Photo by Lamborghini
The 2022 Lamborghini Essenza SCV12 Photo by Lamborghini
The 2022 Lamborghini Essenza SCV12 Photo by Lamborghini
The 2022 Lamborghini Essenza SCV12 Photo by Lamborghini
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Well, of course, it’s a car. An expensive car. As in 2.2-million Euros of angry, bellowing Italian V12. That is, at current exchange rate, about CDN$3.2 million. It is not, even by one-percenter standards, your average Huracan.
It is also — and this is where it fits right in with Williams’ definition of “telling you you’re making to much money” — a car without a real purpose. You see, the Essenza is a track weapon. Not just some sort of warmed-over Aventador, but a real slick-tired, stiffly-suspended, not-a-muffler-to-be-found race car.
And yet, it is not legal for any current race series. It is not homologated according to any series’ rules, nor will there be any Lamborghini Super Trofeo-like single-marque competition where owners can pit themselves against similarly monied supercar enthusiasts. The Essenza is, in the purist definition of money-really-is-no-object hedonism, a race car with no race.
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The 2022 Lamborghini Essenza SCV12 Photo by Lamborghini
Oh, Lamborghini organizes Essenza-only track days for its ultra-rich customers. It will even provide a full Lamborghini-trained pit crew, as well as a full complement of the spare parts needed to keep the beast running smoothly and all the necessary race rubber you’ll need. If it’s part of one of the company’s proscribed programs — the Essenzas will be track-daying concurrently with Lambo’s Super Trofeo finale in Portimao, Portugal this year — that’s all part of the $3.2-million asking price.
If you want to run it elsewhere, well, Lamborghini will be happy to charge you between 50,000 and 100,000 Euros to ship your car to the track of your choice and maintain it for you — Epicurean dining, private jets, and penthouse suites at the Ritz-Carleton all extra, of course. In other words, we’re at the pointy end of self-gratification, here. If you’ve got millions to burn and a lead foot you need to satiate, this is the car for you.
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There’s more to this intemperance. The SCV12 will probably be the last purely naturally aspirated V12 that Santa’Agata ever produces. Hybridization is Lamborghini’s future — though, unlike Toyota et al , the Bolognese have been experimenting with superconductors — and CEO Stefan Winkelmann has promised an all-electrified future by 2024. The V12 may survive sans an exhaust-note-stultifying turbocharger, but it will never be as pure as this again.
Especially since the Essenza has absolutely no muffling, there being absolutely nothing between piston and (end of) pipe to dull the cacophony. To hear the SC being warmed up in the Motor Speedway’s pits is to relive Formula One’s ‘70s heydays, when Screaming Matras burst ear drums and frightened local wildlife. Nor do its 19-inch Pirellis — specific only to the SCV12, by the way — have any treads. They’re as slick as, well, slicks, every square inch of surface aimed at gripping tarmac as tenaciously as possible. There are no lights, no turn signals, and, as I said, not even a hint of muffler. The steering wheel has enough buttons to confuse Lewis Hamilton — everything from ABS intervention to throttle mapping is fully adjustable — a five-point racing harness replaces the normal seat belt, and the driver’s seat, like all race cars looking for maximum safety, is rigidly fixed to the floor pan.
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The only thing separating this Lamborghini from pretty much every other race car I’ve sat in is that there is no roll cage. But that’s only because the Essenza is the first racer to make its carbon-fibre tub/roof rigid enough to meet the FIA’s latest LMH “Hypercar” regulations without the need for a steel roll cage.
The 2022 Lamborghini Essenza SCV12 Photo by Lamborghini
Surprisingly, the 819 horsepower the modified 6.5-litre V12 pushes out is the least of the Essenza’s adrenaline rushes. Oh, it sounds like all of Hades unleashed right behind your left ear. And certainly the lunge forward every time you crush the loud-handle is immediate and unrelenting. But, other than that extraordinary cacophony, it’s at least familiar, the big V12 typical Lamborghini. A bit more playful, perhaps, and certainly, as I’ve said at least three times now, louder. But familiar nonetheless. If you’ve matted the throttle on the latest SVJ version of the Aventador, you’ll be more than acquainted with the 6.5L’s performance.
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The rest of the Essenza experience, however, is all-new. This is not just some Aventador stripped of its radio and bolstered with stiffer Bilsteins. Yes, the tub, or central carbon-fibre monocoque, is based on the Aventador and Sian. But the front suspension, if you can call the brick-hard ride “suspension,” is mounted to an all-new subframe. And though the engine block may be standard, it’s been rotated 180 degrees so that the six-speed Xtrac sequential gearbox is behind the engine — moving the engine forward offers better mass centralization — rather than in front like road-going V12s. Married to rear differential that allows you to adjust its locking effect and gives you the ability to alter the brake bias (to account for tire wear) between the front and rear axles, the Essenza is as focused as any race car.
Author David Booth and the 2022 Lamborghini Essenza SCV12 Photo by Lamborghini
Author David Booth and the 2022 Lamborghini Essenza SCV12 Photo by Lamborghini
Author David Booth and the 2022 Lamborghini Essenza SCV12 Photo by Lamborghini
The 2022 Lamborghini Essenza SCV12 Photo by Lamborghini
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Grip, once the surprisingly durable Pirelli slicks are warmed up, is incredible. Oh, in first-gear hairpins, there’s a hint of understeer — easier to handle for some of the less-than-fully-trained owners who might play silly buggers on the track — but for all intents and purposes, the Essenza, once in its rhythm, feels like it’s being sucked into the tarmac.
That’s because it is. Or, more accurately, it’s being pushed down onto the road. The huge wing that dominates the rear bonnet — along with copious diffusers — generates no less than 1,200 kilograms of downforce at 250 kilometres an hour. Since the entire car weighs only 1,376 kilos, that means, given enough speed, the SC V12’s ultra-grippy slicks are being pushed into tarmac with almost twice its static weight. The understeer I mentioned completely disappears by the time you hit third gear.
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Not only does that generate cornering like nothing seen on the even super-est of street-legal Lambos, all those g-forces make working the Essenza more, well, work than racing a Huracan STO ’round a track. It’s a physical beast, is the SCV12. Thanks in part to all that aforementioned aerodynamic downforce, the steering is high-effort. As is resisting the g-force. The suspension, at anything less than full Gonzo, is jarring to say the least. And the motorsport-grade cast-iron brake rotors may be worthy of Le Mans, but they require the quadriceps of a bodybuilder. Most street cars, no matter how super, require less than 1,000 psi of line pressure before the ABS kicks in; in the Essenza that notches up to 1,400 before the Brembos start getting serious. Manhandling steering wheel and brake pedal, not to mention contending with all the g-forces, means you’ll work up quite the lather quite quickly. All to say that one exits a day in the Essenza both exhilarated and exhausted.
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The 2022 Lamborghini Essenza SCV12 Photo by Lamborghini
There are, however, a few concessions to comfort. The seating position, for instance, has obviously taken creaky backs into account. Unlike most fixed racing seats, there’s actually a fair amount of recline built into the seat back. Even with my wonky back, I could drive the Essenza all day, when I’m normally limited to 15-minute stints before herniated discs start begging for mercy. There is even — and this is by far the biggest indicator that the Essenza is a “customer” car — air conditioning, lest any of the gentlemen racers overwhelm their Old Spice underarm deodorant.
But those concessions are not to say that the Essenza is not a real race car. In fact, it’s faster than many a real racer, Lamborghini claiming the Essenza is, in the hands of an experience driver, three to four seconds faster than the company’s own GT3 racers around any given track. And, according to the company’s head of motorsport development, Giorgio Sanna, that gap only becomes wider if the driver is less experienced. Indeed, for all its bark, outrageous speed and jarring suspension, the Essenza is remarkably easy to drive, the most accommodating slick-shod racer I’ve yet tested. For the billionaire addicted to high-speed hijinks, there is no safer rush. And if you get one in Verde Alceo, it, too, will loudly proclaim that you make way too much money without, to quote Williams once again, the paranoia and impotence wrought by the Devil’s Dandruff.
Author’s note: Unfortunately, even if you have F-you money to burn, you’ll not be able to get your hands on an Essenza. At least not a brand-new one. All of its limited production run of 40 have been spoken for, with half that number delivered already. So far, none have found their way to Canada, but there are six south of the border.
Keyword: First Drive: Lamborghini Essenza SCV12